User blog:Ezekielguy/List of fun things to do when your parents leave you to babysit an annoying little brat

Your parents and their friends are going out to dinner and an "adult movie". So they leave you at their friend's house to take care of THEIR kid. Bummer, right? But don't sweat. I've got you covered. Here are some fun things to do with the kid.

(This also works for younger siblings.)

1. Set your kid up with a game system and plop in a disk that you have painted to look "educational". The game is actually something really fun and violent like "Tribes 2" or "Grand Theft Auto".

2. Teach the little brat to make prank phone calls. "Excuse me, do you have Prince Albert in a can?"

3. Most parents want their kids to have healthy meals. Hire a fancy gourmet catering company to give him/her fancy meals, with table cloth and all that jazz. See how the kid actually likes it. BLEH!

4. Movie time. Hm...These little guys like animation, right? OK! Adult Anime movies, anyone? But, seriously, if you have an actual baby, put on My Neighbor, Totoro. The newborns deserve something clean and kid-friendly.

5. If you did # 3, the kid will probably say he/she is hungry. Fine. Just order him some Pizza.

6. Time to tuck them in. Read them a chapter of Stephen Hawking's auto-biography before bed. Ah, the classics. The kids parents come home in an hour. That means you gotta turn off Adult Swim or the Sci-Fi channel or whatever and make the kid swear not to tell what happened. Parents will pay you. Yay.